Until recently, I’ve always had a thing against motorcycles. When I was a kid, I split my chin open 8 times. At least, I think 8 is the “official” number. Whatever…I was always landing on my face. Yes, I have arms. I’m not typing this with my nose. I guess I fell faster than most kids…that’s the only explanation I have for why my arms couldn’t get out in front of me fast enough.
One of the last times I split my chin open I was on my 10 speed and was moving pretty fast on the way to the public pool. My family was packing to get ready for a two-week trip to Colorado, and I think my mom wanted me out of the way for the afternoon. So she sent me to the pool. I was riding with one of my friends when we decided to race to the end of the supermarket parking lot (a shortcut to the pool). The old lady in the sedan didn’t know we were coming, backed out, and I smacked into her car head-on.
I always figured that if I could do that kind of damage to my body on a 10-speed I imagine traveling somewhere on a powered bike would end me up in traction for months. Hence, the lack of interest in motorcycles. Guitars and drums were much safer for me.
Lately that attitude has changed. Riding a motorcycle well has become an art to me. I have a friend who rides a Harley with his wife, and it’s the coolest thing ever. I’m into a little bit of risk now, and the possibility of pain no longer scares me so much. I’m in a men’s group where several of the men ride bikes to the meetings. And my father and I have been talking about taking a trip across the west on Harleys or something, camping along the way. I love the idea and hope we make it a reality. One of my goals for the next 12 months is to take a motorcycle-riding training course.
But not all bikes are created equally. We have a guy living in our building who rides a BMW motorcycle. Pardon the language, but what a pussy bike. I mean, really. Motorcycles are, in my opinion, a celebration of manhood, of testosterone, and a hint of dominant sexuality. This BMW motorcycle is the antithesis of all of the above.
What brings all of this up, you ask? Well, I was on the way to work this morning, at a stop sign, when I let a motorcyclist with long hair flowing from the helmet go in front of me. My first thought was “Damn! If you’re a girl, you’re HOT!” This thought was shortly followed by a shudder and the thought “If you’re a guy, I’m really creeped out right now and need a shower.”
She was a girl. She had to have been! Even if it was a sort-of “guy” bike…that just made her more cool. Because she’s a cool girl. Right?
Right?
5 comments:
Relax, J...it was me with the long flowing hair. There...happy now??
Harleys are cool and photogenic but it's a red Ducati that does it for me every time!
I come from a motorcycle riding family. But hubby dear has the fear that you spoke about and won't let me buy one (even though I am dying to). Yep they are hot, I agree.
There are no pussy bikes, just pussy riders. And, anyone who would make such a blanket statement about a BMW motorcyle obviously knows very little about motorcycles.
Woo-Hoo! My first irate comment! Welcome, Mr. or Mrs. Anonymous.
It's more of a comment on "brand name" than actual bikes. When you hear the initials "BMW" what do you think of?
Now, when you hear the name "Harley" what do you think of?
I rest my case.
And you're right...I don't know a lot about motorcycles. And I'm ok with that.
Hey, I wasn't really irate, but I've owned a Harley in the past, and a few Hondas, and now I own a BMW.
What one thinks of when one hears a brand name really depends on one's experience with said brand.
For example, my BMW K 1200 S is one of the fastest production bikes in the world right now. It rides great, it looks great, and it is extremely well-engineered (which is the first thing I think of when I hear BWM).
Then there are the dedicated motorcyclists who often use their BMW enduro/adventure bikes to travel all over the world, especially to the most remote and challenging locations ever covered on two wheels (look up Helge Pedersen, for instance).
So, judging motorcyles, or riders for that matter, based on image is a mistake. Both Harleys and BMWs are great bikes, just very different.
Anyway, once you're cured of your fear of smashing your face the way used to do on your 10 speed (I had a buddy like that when I was young), I hope you do get into motorcyling. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
Take care,
Robert
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